DALMING | Bye, social media (Week 4)

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BY ROMA GONZALES ‘ tag=’h3′ style=’blockquote modern-quote’ size=” subheading_active=’subheading_below’ subheading_size=’15’ padding=’10’ color=” custom_font=”][/av_heading]

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Bye, social media (Week 4)

FINALLY. This experimental social media abstinence is drawing to its final days. I wish I could say it was not difficult, but it was; and although I have been looking forward to the day when I can finally sign in back into my accounts and hit as many “like” buttons as I can, I am so reluctant to enter the noisy virtual dimension again that I am compelled to probably just stay offline.

I was not an addict to begin with. I just noticed how deeply some posts can actually affect us and influence our actions and choices from day to day without us even knowing it. Besides that, I wanted to see how inseparable our lives have been with the “online dimension.”
True enough, I enjoyed this time offline. When I meet friends, we actually have more things to talk about because I haven’t seen their posts. They have to explain their life events and other new memes and trends that I can’t relate to. It never seemed like it diminishes our friendship or my self-esteem, being the kid who doesn’t get the new jokes. Without the pressure of “what’s new and in and popular,” I also got to spend my free time doing the things that I am actually interested in.

But to some degree, the toughest part of staying offline, at least for me during the course of three weeks now, is the hindered social interaction with people you don’t see often and people you’re trying to know better. Social media, as it promises, is a way to close the gaps of distance and time. Though not as binding as vis-a-vis banters and jests, the exchange of written quips online is still a bridge, rickety and artificial as it may seem.

Nevertheless, more than once was I told with shock and disappointment, “Ay, tingala ko man nga indi ta ka ma-tag.” This somehow shows how much going out with friends in real life is not yet “finalized” or “cemented” until it goes into the ethernet. There’s that look of dismay when newly-made connections learn they can’t “add” you online, because virtual exchanges are apparently considered as a continuation and a much accessible form of communication. I thought I can eventually get used to this reaction, but I still can’t shake that lingering voice that continually asks “What am I missing out on?” It gives me some anxiety, but I can’t really say how incomparable it is to the anxiety I get when I make comparisons of my life versus the awesome posts people make online. Besides, it may take longer than a month to truly detoxify yourself from social media which we’ve been using for years, back to when Friendster and MySpace were still in. Perhaps eventually, this voice will quiet down.

Also, I am pining for Instagram. It’s stronger on some days (on premenstrual ones, I believe) than others. It has been basically a creative outlet. It’s like the lost diary you secretly wish people would read because you are more eloquent there and you hope they’ll understand you more through it. Aside from the charm of human interactions without leaving the armchair, social media is also an effective trap because ironically, it is a form of release, a catharsis.

In conclusion, I can say it is possible to live without social media. However, for a 21st century person (especially Millennials) who lives and works with people with internet connectivity, it’s very much like swimming against the tide. In fact, I have only closed my personal FB and Instagram accounts, but have kept my Messenger. It was necessary to make an alternative FB account that only follows news pages and important posts. Once I had to reactivate my account because I need to see other people’s profiles to write an article.

It’s difficult to point out this issue, this negative aspect of what also promises to bind us, when so many people are fond of social networking sites and are pressured by the society to jump in on the bandwagon because it’s the new norm and it’s all rainbow and butterflies on the surface level. Most people don’t feel its darkness and poison, and I still wonder sometimes
if the fault lies on those who do. Nonetheless, Mark Twain has this to say, “Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it is time to reform (or pause and reflect).”
Social media is not inherently evil. Like money, it is a tool that facilitates and amplifies our human tendencies, although regrettably it is mostly the erring side. So much good has happened online, that is a fact, such as crowdfunding for certain causes or an outpour of financial support for a person who has met an unfortunate accident. However, because its use and regulation is largely based on one’s discretion, it has easily become a feeding ground for the insecure, the opportunists, and the narcissists. And if we haven’t still turned into one of them or their prey, we should at least always tread the web with caution. (rr_gonzales316@yahoo.com/PN)
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