On the Autism Spectrum
BY AIZA DELA CRUZ
I REMEMBER when my son was two years old and not diagnosed then. He barely spoke. He could say mama, “dede”, and recite the ABCs, but that’s it. He scarcely calls me “mama”. And I still did not see anything wrong with my son. It is said that a mother understands what a child could not say. It is the same with me. From spending so much time with my son, I already know when he is hungry, what he wants, or when he is not feeling well, even though he does not speak.
Seeing him well fed and taken care of by the nanny was enough for me. My husband and I were both busy and immersed in our personal goals. It was my mother-in-law who pointed out that our son was not meeting developmental goals. This was an eye-opener for me.
I realized that I did not truly understand my son. This was when we decided to focus more on our son and give him the attention and education that he needs. Our son became our personal goal. We both made a schedule and activities to do with our son to help him speak more. We also instilled discipline and routine. We became “narrators” and “radio announcers” in our home to teach and encourage our son to speak. The truth is, it did not even cross our minds at the time, that our son was autistic. We thought that he only has a speech delay. Our doctor said speech delay is usually one of the signs of autism.
It was also our doctor who pointed out his other autistic behaviors which we did not see nor thought about much. Our son flaps his hands whenever he feels agitated, frustrated, and happy. His hands would move up and down, arms near his body and not outstretched, accompanied with some random sounds like “Ahh Ahh”.
The other one was his obsession or extreme interest to line up things, may it be cars, blocks, or shapes. He would line them up several times until he would be satisfied with how they look. He didn’t want anyone touching them or going near them. If it is touched, he would push you away and fix it again, or throw a tantrum by crying.
His extreme interest was also apparent when he would watch his favorite shows on YouTube. When he was just about one year old, he only wants to watch a specific “Six Little Ducks” video over and over again. As he grew older, he would have a variety of interests such as cows, puzzles, drawing, lego, solar system, and rockets. His interest in these things would last for months. His extreme interest was a good thing as he has taught himself swimming, writing, reading, drawing, the solar system, and many other things. However, it takes a lot of effort to get his interest.
My son has proprioceptive dysfunction as part of his autism. Specifically, he is sensory seeking. Proprioception is the body’s ability to sense itself or body awareness which also detects and controls force and pressure. Children who have proprioceptive dysfunction have difficulty knowing where their body is in space and do not understand boundaries or personal space when playing and interacting with other people. This is one of the reasons why it is difficult to get my son’s attention and interest as he cannot sit still. He plays rough. He cannot control his force and pressure, holds his pencil tight and writes too hard, shakes his feet or stamps his feet when sitting down, runs around and jumps a lot even when just walking, and sings a lot while moving his body and hands. His body needs sensory stimulation to facilitate attention and learning. It is not because he lacks discipline it is because his body needs movement to stimulate his brain.
Another tell-tale sign of his autism was his aversion to eye contact. It was something only other people observed because as his mother, we always have eye contact. When I would sing, talk or read to him, he would listen and look me constantly in the eyes. When we were lying down, he would look at me in the eyes and lie down on my chest as if to convey his affections. When this was pointed out to me by my mother-in-law, I could not understand it as I had no difficulty with eye contact with my son. So I observed my son and did notice that he does not give eye contact with people. He would turn his head sideways and look at other things. If you guide his head to have eye contact with you, he will avert his eyes. As he grew older, he got better at having eye contact with other people. However, his eye contact is limited to people he has close and frequent interaction with.
My son’s reluctance to eye contact is on the same level as his indifference when his name is called. He is unresponsive when his name is called. You cannot call his attention by saying his name. He would walk away, go on with what he is doing as if he does not hear you, turn his head sideways, and sing whatever nursery rhyme that comes into his head. It’s not because he did not hear you, or is pretending not to hear you, but because he did not associate his name to himself. We had to familiarize him with his name by always saying his name and starting our sentences with his name when we talk to him.
These behaviors are just some of the many autistic traits that my son has. I hope that when you encounter children with this behavior, you would be more sympathetic and tolerant towards them as they are something they have no control with.
I would like to share that there is a free app, ASDetect, an early autism detection method with 81-83% accuracy, for download to help parents monitor their children’s growth and development.
I enjoin everyone to have more compassion and understanding for all children with special needs.
I would also like to hear the experiences of other parents who have children on the autism spectrum. You may email me at genevieveaiza.delacruz@gmail.com. I am a member of the Autism Society Philippines (ASP), a national, non-profit organization dedicated to the well-being of persons on the autism spectrum disorder. /PN
