I WOULD have wanted to be home in Iloilo by March 2021.
But there were delays in my house renovations, and I didn’t get the checks until March 11.
***
Then, there was the vaccine issue.
I didn’t get my second shot until April 19.
And then, there was my decision to finally take care of my hemorrhoids surgically.
***
I had my hemorrhoidectomy on June 3, and I’m still recovering down there five weeks later.
Oh, yeah! I’m feeling like a virgin.
***
The plan was to visit friends in Canada first before finally coming home to the Philippines.
But Canada hasn’t fully lifted its border restrictions yet.
My boyfriend Justin Trudeau is currently looking at mid-August to allow non-essential travels of fully vaccinated Americans into his beloved Canada.
***
Originally, the plan for my Canada trip was July 15 to August 31.
We were banking on a total lifting of border restrictions on July 4.
The July 5 announcement said, Canada will make another announcement by July 21.
***
So, anyway, in another development, a godson invited me to Alaska.
I booked myself for September 13 to 20.
Thinking I could still go to Canada from July 23-August 31, if it happens.
***
But with the new July 15 announcement of a mid-August end of the border restriction suspense drama, would my friends in Vancouver be happy if I just visited them from August 18 to September 11 (four weeks)?
***
Half of me wants to please people.
I mean, if they are feeding me, and saving me money while also allowing me to travel like a millionaire, why couldn’t I let them host me for at least six weeks (when they’re begging me to stay for three months, at least)?
***
It’s heartbreaking to see them counting their saved dollars (from a mason jar) which are earmarked for my food budget.
How can I be not generous with my time?
***
My friends also work for tips (in addition to their salaries in hotels and retirement homes).
Their salaries go to their monthly bills and families.
The tips, they said, are saved for my visit.
***
What’s really weighing me down is the thought that an online boyfriend is impatiently waiting for me in the Philippines.
I’m not sure that he is impatient, but he says so, and he has this tone of being betrayed.
***
I met the boy online in October.
And it is true that I promised to come home sooner.
Like, when my house gets sold (March), when I am fully vaccinated (April), when I have had my surgery (June), when I am recovered from surgery (July).
***
How do you explain to an online boyfriend, a potential partner, a trip to Canada, to Alaska, and who knows where else in the world that accepts fully vaccinated cosmopolitans?
How do I prove that I mean it when I say I love you?
***
Another pressure (small, but still a pressure) is a friend currently in the south of France.
She wants me to join her.
She knows I have the money and the flexibility.
But how do I explain everything including the online boyfriend waiting in the Philippines?
***
And so I am stuck.
I’m doing OK in Los Angeles right now.
I’ve been editing my textbook manuscripts, then writing some.
But mostly, I’m just having a chill time bonding with my sister and her family.
***
Which brings me to the idea of my other sister in the UK who wants me to visit her and her family.
Just last week, I got a very rare barrage of calls from my nephew telling me about his birthday party.
And this kid hasn’t initiated any calls to me in years!/PN
