THE WORD “someday” and the 50s do not go together.
At the very least, in my case.
I had a very late start in financial security.
I grew up middle class.
Looking back now, I think that I was a little disappointed that my way to medical school was not paved in certainty.
So, I ended up with very few possibilities after getting my bachelor’s degree in Biology.
***
I started to work right after college.
It was a poor-paying job, and the work was with the marginally poor of the urban society.
It needs miracles most of the day, and most of all.
It is easy to see now why I could hear the voice of God calling me into the priesthood.
***
The seminary didn’t work for me.
But I tried to stay on with the vision for a while.
I worked as a religious missionary in Macau and Hong Kong.
And then, I got psychically burned out.
So, I bummed around some more.
***
I went to teaching, and bummed out some more after that.
In 2001, I decided that I should study Nursing as a second course. As a back up plan.
I became a nurse in 2005.
I immigrated to America in 2006.
***
In America, I started to breakdown the limits of my Filipino upbringing.
I saw a much bigger world; I adopted a bigger vision of the world.
But I’m pretty conservative as a Filipino, or was very trusting of my creative and artistic side.
It was Art for me, more than money.
***
I grew up with plans and dreams.
“Someday, I’m going to do this. Someday, I’m going to do that.”
At 40, I began to really change. I began to enjoy my money, and life as I know it now.
I stopped using the word ‘someday’.
What I wanted, I got.
At 45, I said, F*ck it, let’s do great things. And I did!
I mean, at 45, I felt a certain degree of financial security.
By then, I have already worked as a Registered Nurse for eight years.
I have even decided to retire from the workforce.
***
So, I’m 53 this year.
I’ve been doing a lot of traveling in the last ten years.
I’ve lived in airports and train stations.
Take it from me, there is no better way to enjoy the world than when you are younger.
I’d say in your twenties, if you can afford it.
If you need more time to save money, do it in your 30s.
40s and 50s are a little difficult.
I only do it now because of my pride. I do not want to be called “too old to travel”.
But if you are going to climb mountains, hike through the snow, run after trains, you need to do it when you are in your 30s.
***
There’s an easier way to see the world.
Travel agencies, tour packages, taxis, hotels, restaurants.
And then, there’s my way: cheaper, but needs some work.
Which I like to do even in my 50s.
I’m very least likely to get travel agents and booking agencies.
I just enjoy trips that way.
By now, I’m already so used to immigration officers, train operators, vending machines, and street food.
***
Twenty years ago, ‘someday’ for me means at least 15 years later, or when I win the lottery, or never.
Today, ‘someday’ for me has a specific date. Like next month, or two months from now, or six months from now.
But never over a year later.
In fact, I cannot think very well past two weeks.
I live for the day. Day to day. Everyday.
***
If there are long-term plans for reunions, I do not commit myself because I do not know where I will be when the date finally comes.
I only say yes to that which I can see happening.
Meaning, within a fortnight.
At the most, within 30 days.
***
At 40, I took to heart all those sayings about how time is irreplaceable.
How if not now, then when?
How true wealth is enjoying the best things in life that are supposedly free.
How to seize the day.
In fact, at 40, I started contemplating of retiring from work pretty early. Like at age 45.
***
And so, I did.
When my husband died, I put myself out there… within the year.
I created The September Project on social media.
It didn’t get me a man.
But I had fun with it.
It got me a lot of men.
But that’s our story for July./PN
