THERE’S wisdom in old age. As you grow older, you become wiser. It’s the natural order of things. Given that, I had a conversation with an older friend who told me this Christmas that she focuses on what makes her happy and leaves her cares behind to which a millennial said, “Yes, it should be intentional.” Meaning, it’s a conscious decision to be happy.
Are we all in agreement?
I couldn’t agree more. Now, everyone goes through a rough patch in life — on several occasions for most people, we get broken — who hasn’t had her share of brokenness in life, huh — all of us do, becomes stuck in that dump for a while, seeks relief, grieves, gets angry at himself and the world, then excruciatingly proceeds to the healing process.
It sounds easy, but in reality, it’s hellish. It’s tough and you need all the support you can get to go through and survive this shattered phase in your life.
Thus, we go back to intentional happiness. It doesn’t need to be expensive nor far-off. All you need to do — no matter how angry, lost, or beaten you are — is to take stock of what makes you happy and commit to doing it. Again, it sounds easy but what choice do you have? After hitting rock bottom, where do you go next? Isn’t the next route going up? Yes, it’s hard but I wouldn’t write about it if I hadn’t been there.
What are the activities that truly make you happy. The simple ones that don’t cost much especially when you are broke, as well, no pun intended.
If you love to dance, groove it. If you love music, find a regular spot, and bask in the comfort of the sonata. If you love sunsets, watch it every single day and bathe in its glow. If it’s the outdoors for you, find the setting that best calms your soul. If you love to read, borrow books. All these are intentional actions that are tremendously helpful and not draining on the wallet.
However, I believe that it’s easier to keep a joyful mindset if you have fully accepted yourself — your authentic self — and are aware of what you can and cannot give as an individual. If someone asks, say you are depressed but you don’t want to talk about it — unless you do want to talk about it.
We must admit that some people will exhaust us because they suck our energy which is completely unhealthy. This is the part where setting boundaries is important. But there is also that point where you deliberately ignore counsel, dismiss reason — especially if you are younger and want to prove yourself — because you think you can hack it on your own! Well and fine, sail on, but when the going gets tough, you shouldn’t come back to seek advice and guidance — that you disregarded early on — for you are such a pain in the ass, still no pun intended.
Moving forward, I’m sure that all of us have our respective shares of ogres of Christmases past. The bad Christmas experiences deserving to be obliterated from our memory. Not all Christmases are happy. It’s sad but it’s real.
Here’s praying that whatever state you are in right now — whether you are facing your ogre this Christmas or kicking it out, you will come out victorious.
Personally, I have a good Christmas this year. It’s a full year and I am happy. I realized that a good deal of my joy comes from the talk show. It’s an avenue expanding my friendship base — I made many friends this year, and in an effortless way, re-roots me to the city of my birth.
On this note, I pray that our New Year 2024 will be another year of healing — from our brokenness, achievements, intentional happiness, victories, and strength derived from our stronghold: The LORD is a refuge for the oppressed, a stronghold in times of trouble. – Psalm 9:9
P.S. Birthday blessings to Hezekiah Kit, my eldest, born at dawn, January 1st, a couple of New Years ago. Praying for the accomplishment of your dreams.
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The writer hosts Woman Talk with Belinda Sales at 91.1 Balita FM Tagbilaran City every Saturday, 2 p.m. to 3:30 p.m. She can be reached at belindabelsales@gmail.com. Twitter @ShilohRuthie./PN
