A bit of foreplay to get you aroused for Holy Week

THESE DAYS the Philippine Catholic Church is on its lowest ebb credibility-wise with so many of its priests and supposedly disente prominent members involved in scandals, particularly the perverted sexual kind of scandal.

The hypocrisy is deafening, almost of biblical proportions i.e. Monsignor Arnel Lagarejos charged with statutory rape involving a 13-year-old girl or that priest in Camarines Sur, a certain Fr. Paul Tirao who was accused of killing his lover.

And we have Archbishop Socrates Villegas using the pulpit threatening eternal damnation if you vote for President Duterte’s senatorial candidates, then the numerous priests who have abused and molested altar boys.

Of course, the hypocrisy is not new; it just escalated beyond biblical proportions. It has been happening long before “le affair Jim Paredes”.

A few years ago there was uproar in these islands particularly amongst the so-called faithful Catholics a.k.a. the disente about a book and eventually a film based on that book. That particular book was Dan Brown’s Da Vinci Code and the film on that book which also had the same title – although the book was much detailed while the film sort of tried to compress everything within two hours.

Basically the book and the film are one and the same, based on the same plot and storyline.

It was a book on fiction, the story loosely based on thesuppressed gospel, “The Gospel of Mary Magdalene” wherein she was actually the wife of Jesus Christ and escaped to France pregnant with their child after the crucifixion and that child started the line of ancient French kings, the Merovingian Dynasty.

Anyway there were several so-called self-appointed guardians of morality that were very loud and shrill calling on the government to ban both book and film on the ground that these were blasphemous and could shake the very foundations and faith of the Philippine Catholic Church.

Bullocks! How in the world could a book on fiction shake your faith in your religion? Perhaps it could if your belief is based on shallow and weak foundations?

Of course nothing happened. The book and film were not banned and after sometime the uproar died down, but sales of that book went sky high and it became a status symbol; then it became fashionable sipping an espresso while reading that book in hip and trendy coffee shops in Legaspi Village.

Incidentally, those “self-appointed guardians of morality” are also the very same people that supported the “cult of the yellow ribbon” and now want to bring President Rodrigo Duterte down.

And we segue to a book that’s on top of President Rodrigo Duterte’s reading list: Altar of Secrets.

Yes it’s about the Philippine Catholic Church and it’s all about the juicy secrets, scandals and corruption that the padre and madre de cacaos would like to sweep under the hems of their habits and cassocks.

So yes, it’s a book about the naughty priests and bishops having fun. Moi wonders if they’re on the “naughty” list of Santa Claus; most definitely they’re not on the “nice” list.

The book is the modern version of the “Canterbury Tales”, “Lady Chatterley’s Lover” and other medieval ribald tales all rolled into one in a modern setting.

While these medieval ribald tales are just that (tales), this book is all about real events. It’s the Philippines’ version of “Sex in the City” minus Carrie Bradshaw, Samantha Jones, Charlotte York, and Miranda Hobbes; instead it has for the main characters real live priests, monsignors and archbishops.

If they were scandalized by Dan Brown’s fictional book “Da Vinci Code”, imagine their reactions to this book Altar of Secrets which is about real people and events that happened under our very noses while we were listening to the homily.

The author Aries C. Rufo was a beat reporter for The Manila Times and The Manila Standard covering politics, judiciary and religion. He was a multi awardee for journalism and co- author also of several books.

So yes, you can say he knew what he was writing about and it was no tall tale or work of fiction but a factual documentary on the fiascos of the Philippine Catholic Church.

Here are excerpts from the first chapters:

Part One, Chapter 1 “Closet Fathers”

Tucked somewhere in Metro Manila was a gated orphanage run by nuns. But this is no ordinary orphanage. It was (or still might be) home to some of the children fathered by Catholic priests. The sister in charge confirmed that they had housed children whose fathers were priests.

Priests fathering children, violating their vow of continence and celibacy, is a phenomenon that seems to have lost its shock value. Sure some people are still scandalized, but even Church higher-ups have accepted this as a matter of course. In fact, the Archdiocese of Manila has an allocation for financial support to children fathered by members of the clergy.

And this is quite literally taking the title “Father” to its true meaning that one or a priest through (pun intended) sexual intercourse with a woman has fathered an offspring, the fruit of his loins.

It seems Padre Damaso still lives in the libido of the members of the clergy belonging to the Philippine Catholic Church.

Moving on, still on Part One Chapter 1 “Closet Fathers”:

A brethren, Bishop Chrisostomo Yalung, would be forced to resign for fathering a child with a married woman. And a few months later, Bishop Teodoro Bacani followed in Yalung’s footsteps, after he was accused of sexual harassment by his secretary.

For sure there are a lot of deprived horny priests out there following with much gusto and enthusiasm one of God’s famous and often quoted line… Go forth and multiply!

So is the foreplay working and your curiosity aroused? Moi is pretty sure the juices are flowing and to think we’re only on Chapter One.

One thing is certain, the hypocrisy of the Philippine Catholic Church! It demands the faithful and the government to be accountable and above all righteous and moral yet it cannot even do the same for its clergy. (brotherlouie16@gmail.com/PN)