BY BORDI JAEN
SOMETIME before the pandemic got worse, I used to play badminton with a good friend once or sometimes twice a week.
Admittedly, I am not an athlete. I enjoyed the more sedentary mental crafts such as reading and public speaking. However, only fools don’t strive to make themselves better. With that in mind, I set out to begin playing badminton with the support of my friend who is way better than I, being a former varsity player.
As I ruminate, I can still remember the first few times we played. It wasn’t easy at the beginning. Then again, when is the beginning of something ever easy?
I remember the many times I sucked. I would throw the ball the wrong way. I couldn’t catch the shuttlecock. My serving made the shuttlecock go left when my friend was positioned to the right.
Fortunately for me, my friend was a very patient person, and she didn’t mind because she understood that I was once in her shoes, a neophyte. In fact, I was so bad that the coach, out of pity perhaps, offered to give the basic lessons to me for free! That was how bad I was.
I had to swallow my pride. One mustn’t let something like our ego go in the way of what could be a better version of ourselves. The common linkage of we humans, in our most noble and enlightened form, is the desire for the collective advancement of our species. To take advantage of this, one must accept the help given along the way. They make the journey easier.
For our own personal advancement, it helps to keep the ego down and focus on our one goal. Don’t get me wrong, of course there are those who will try their utmost to bring who they perceive as competition down. They are saboteurs.
However, humans have friends. There are people who derive contentment from bringing others up. They exist and why should we not be open to helping hands? Why should we not utilize the opportunities given? The beginning is the hardest and there will be those who make the burden slightly lighter.
When I made a crappy badminton move back then, I had the tendency of glancing at the other players in court. Like the human that I am, I was feeling anxious out of judgment from other people. It is a very human experience to feel those eyes of judgment. The eyes of others that one thinks cast the glance of discouragement and criticism.
Upon meditating on these, I realized that the eyes of judgment came not from others but from myself. As the Christian song says, “for the confusions around are mere reflections of what’s within”. We project our insecurity to the outside, like a mirror that bounces light. When the walls of esteem within are strengthened, the soul grows strong and withstands attacks. This is an especially useful thought because there are people who will criticize unconstructively indeed. There will be those judging us in front and behind our backs. There will be those who wish their words penetrate us with their harshness. Then yet, mighty Constantinople can’t fall when her Theodosian walls remain strong.
We mind those who offer help. We don’t mind the detractors who give negative criticism. We have dealt with the outside world. We have dealt with those who can help either build or destroy our walls. And yet, there is still the self within to reckon with.
The only thing that can truly stop a person is their self. When a car stops because of a stoplight or pedestrian, it isn’t the car doing that. It’s the man behind the wheel whose feet press the clutch, accelerator, or break. As long as the heart and desire to be better are there, no matter what activity or venture is it, be it in badminton, business, or something as simple as our character, improvement will come bit by bit and inch by inch. The important thing is we hold on to the line despite the rocky seas.
The journey to the top is anything but easy but the breath of the summit gives off a euphoria that only heavenly paradise can match. As René Descartes said, “I think, therefore I am”./PN
