ON APRIL 1, I reported on FRONTPAGE the start of the Palanca Awards 2023.
I also provided the link to the Palanca website where people can read all the rules and guidelines of the contest.
To be honest, I’m still a little ambivalent about my participation in this year’s Palanca.
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But to be very honest about it, I’ve already written two new works since April 1.
I think that they are Palanca worthy.
And then, there are still the works that I think are powerful enough but didn’t win the awards last year, or in 2019.
Do I think that they can be rehashed or resubmitted?
You bet.
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But not a few of my friends have been telling me to take a break from competing, and start judging.
Have I been offered by the Palanca to judge their contests?
Yes, but I’ve always refused.
Because I felt that I still had a few production years in me.
But at 54, I can feel a little exhausted competing, too.
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To be honest (I like this phrase very much in this column), crafting a Palanca story, play, or poetry collection is challenging and fun.
I always feel that I push myself a little when I write what I envision to be a Palanca entry.
Not everything that I write end up being submitted, though.
Sometimes, when I feel that the work is not strong enough, I just sit it out.
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I compete only in categories where I have entries of which I am confident would win.
So, to those wondering about the effort I make to be a perennial Palanca winner, I only have this to say:
I work a lot.
I deserve all the victories and prizes I’ve collected.
I always give my 120% for the Palanca.
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And although I could be “mature” to accept defeat, I am still human enough to feel “sad” for my failed attempts.
I don’t think people should be called competitive if they are unaffected by defeat.
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Winning a Palanca doesn’t get old for me.
21 Palancas including the Hall of Fame, yes; but it’s always fun to push one’s creativity.
As a retired person, I enjoy the challenge of the Palanca.
When I win, I always celebrate it.
Because it’s not everyday that I am celebrated for my writing.
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Gone are the days when readers of my column would actually write or text message me.
Every now and then, social media friends would take a picture of my column in the paper and send them to me.
It still makes me feel good.
Like, it makes me believe that there are still avid readers out there.
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But mostly, I get my kicks on social media these days.
I like posting provocative stuff, and them getting reactions and shares.
But the sense of being appreciated is different with the Palanca.
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As a Palanca winner, one is invited to an awards night.
Good food, free drinks, and being feted as a writer worthy of celebrating.
The awards night is a virtual gathering of Who’s Who in Philippine literature.
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I was 29 when I won my first Palanca in 1998.
That’s 25 years ago.
It also means that I’ve been competing in the Palanca for something like four decades now—the 90s, the 2000s, the 2010s, and now, the 2020s.
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That I won again two prizes last year was awesome.
It means that at 53, I could still compete with the new generation.
With the new styles of writing, new trends, new literatures.
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To be flippant about it, I could just compete in the Palanca year after year until I no longer win for five consecutive years.
Because honestly, I see myself still creating, still producing Palanca-worthy works.
And my guardian angel in heaven will surely cry if I let other people’s intimidation stop me from sharing and entering my best works in the contest.
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To be very honest, I am a little pressured to write a Hiligaynon story for the Palanca this year.
Can I pull a back-to-back win?
Rightly or wrongly, I feel that some people don’t want me to win in the category two years in a row.
And it makes it all more exciting for me.
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But I always subvert expectations.
So what if I sit this year out, and actually agree to judge the Palanca on the condition that I sit to judge the Hiligaynon short story category?
That, too, would be exciting.
Keep posted./PN